"...So, what will you do?"
The question that I was most frequently asked after telling people that I was going to work with the deafblind in Jordan. Most of the time, I smiled, shrugged, and just said, “Touch.”
I want to share a brief reflection on my one-word answer.
In deafblind ministry, there is bad touch and there is good touch. Contrary to what many would assume, the difference is not that bad touch causes pain and good touch gives pleasure. Rather, the difference is that bad touch aims to control, while good touch strives to empower.
If Morhaf needs to go to another room, I do not grab him by the wrist and walk, forcing him to follow me; instead, I slide my hand (palm up) underneath his, gently take hold of it as he takes hold of mine, and then we walk together.
If six-year-old Mohammed throws his upper body on the table during snack-time and should be told to sit up in his chair, I do not push his chest or pull his shoulder; instead, I tap him. Persistently, annoyingly...and eventually, I will probably resort to gentle pushing or pulling.
Sometimes, you control in the moment for the sake of empowering in the future.
And sometimes (though these situations are much less common), you cause pain in the moment for the sake of giving pleasure in the future.
Rumais is a deafblind baby girl whose arms and legs are severely underdeveloped. Like several other students, she must receive physical therapy numerous times each day. Bend one of her knees an inch, and her other leg starts to shake, and she cries and groans.
I am glad that it is less common, because it is much more heart-breaking.
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